Parents always want the best for their children. Then what goes wrong when the intentions of the parents are pure but the result are not in tandem?
First and foremost the parents should be in a mode to transform themselves just as their child is transforming from infant to toddler to teenager to adult.
Many times the parents remain as parents of a toddler while their children have transitioned into the next phase of development. This causes a mismatch between the child's requirements and parents expectations. And when we as parents do not realize this we go on doing unnecessary and in the long run harmful things for our precious little ones.Especially the teen years are to be handled with utmost caution, care and love. Let us dive into few such things that we as parents of a teenager should and should not do to raise confident, compassionate, responsible and happy adults.
Things not to be done at any cost....
Because it is easier to raise good children than to mend broken adults.
Of course children are our most precious gifts and the focus of our lives but
we must refrain from constantly making them feel that way.Once they get used to so much attention from us, then unconsciously they start expecting the same attention from the society. The society obviously is not going to make them the center of their universe like we had done. They will grow up to be self centered and entitled adults. Rather do your own thing and let them follow you by seeing you. This is the best way to teach them how to give their best to the world.
Of course we do not want them to get hurt but do not stop them from exploring new things which we our fearful of. We do get apprehensive and fearful when our child wants to embark on a journey which we are less aware of, but we must not let our apprehensions ride over their desire to do something different. Instead support them when they are fearless and confident. They will learn more by doing than by not doing.
Of course we want to be their pillar of support when they are not in the best of moods,
but we must restrict over selves from quickly jumping in and pacifying our child so that they quickly become fine. Instead help them recognize their feelings and allow them time to settle their emotional turbulence. They will thank you when they grow up. And because of you they will be emotionally much in control of themselves in their adulthood.
We must give our children a carefree childhood but we must not overdo
it to a limit where they become careless and irresponsible. We must keep giving them age appropriate tasks and by taking such responsibilities from an early age they become confident and turn out to be responsible adults.
Don't make your children your boss...though we must listen to our kids seriously and they must have a voice in the house but they must learn to obey us and respect family rules before they are mature enough to make all the decisions on their own. Taking orders and listening to their elders is very crucial for them to become adults who can weigh the pros and cons of various issues that they will later face in life.
Once our children are in their teenage we must let go of many of the ways of parenting a toddler.We must learn to give them time and space to understand the complexities of emotions and ways of the world. Let them face hardships and let them fall, do not expect perfection instead just become available whenever they need you. They look up to you. So
have a heart to heart conversation with them every now and then. Discuss stuff when they want to discuss. Be disciplined and you won't need to punish them. Be their mentors not friends because they have many friends but only you as parents. Stay content and happy. This creates a happy and lovable aura in your house which is conducive for overall mental and emotional development of your child.
I am a successful at home parent. I love reading and writing about various issues. Its fun to listen to other people's perspective and also be able to put forth your own views on a particular topic in a friendly, respectful and pleasant way.